The Great Jordan Burroughs was found safe and sound, dragging the limp lifeless body of a nasty slimy arachnid behind him.
When questioned by a Wrestlers Corner reporter about how he escaped and defeated the beast, Burroughs breathlessly exalted,
“After I made it throw up, I had to go all Chuck Norris on that thing, using my patented double (he didn’t have much of a stance so I was able to forge a comeback), and throwing in a few roundhouse Norris kicks as well."
“What's the best part about being free from its grasps? Asked the bravely intrepid yet slightly naive reporter.
“Best Part? I looked up at the beautiful landscape and realized something magnanimous…."
“I was no longer in Washington, DC."
“Also that I ripped that Magicman shirt he was wearing to shreds during the fight."
PS: If you missed the first two episodes, well – sorry for the spoiler. You can view all three in my new Wrestlers Corner blog.